[alagaesia hobbit]

Ok, everyone is starting one, so I'll make my own starting sucky getting better thing.

________________________________________________________________________________

Inheritance Forums.com always was just a forum site. Despite the people who were convinced it had a slave trade beheind the scenes, convinced that it was front behind the new Imperialised government, with Mike MacCauley at it's head. They were always wrong, it was, after all, just a forum site. Well, that's what the Admins told everyone. But it wasn't.

A very fateful day approached every member of the site. All 10,000 members, were online. All of them. This confused all, especially the RPG head's, Sverdar, and Alagaesia Hobbit, and the General Moderator, Euphoria, when they signed on. The staff lounge had a topic heading it, called "The Project Release"

Diving in almost at the same time, Sver and Hobbit saw before their eyes a topic by Mike, saying that the Admin's project was due to release, and an evil blingybob countdown. It showed this: 2:34:87.
And the seconds dissapeared, leaving almost two minutes before this creation was released on the world.

Sweat beaded on Sverdar's face, and a grimace held Euphoria's features, as they both knew what was coming. They knew what would grip them all in 1:58:34 seconds. They knew that Mike would succeed in the plan he hatched so long ago, that would let him have supreme dominence over thousands. That would let him, become the most feared tyrant the world had ever seen. Well. That Inheritance Forums had ever seen.

1:00:00. Hobbit had no idea what was going on, he had no idea what would happen, and when the countdown reached zero, he knew immediatly.
Bosco was right, Inheritance Forums.com was a front organisation, for all people who joined were tied to a spell, that would transport them all to a land of Mike's creation. That is dated in the Medievil times(With a few tweaks, of course), that would see war, tyranny, rebellion, and tradegy...and also a lot of drunks.

***

Sverdar, Hobbit, and their friend, Bloodyknuckles, walked back from a nice night at the Inn, the Darkstar arms. It was quite a snowy night, and the three of them were walking home before the snow was so high, they couldn't reach their flat. They would have had to stay in there, drunk. Again.
The three of them had been in the new land of Inheritance now for a year, and they understood the way it worked, and the complications that befell the land not after a month after its release.

Mike declared himself the supreme ruler of the world, and the lord of Inheritance. Yoli joined him, along with Massdriver shortly thereafter. Yoli and Mike declared they were to be married. But not all admins were too happy about the sudden loss of power, and soon, Seth dragged Matt and Tim, away, away to a secret and hidden place. Seth took many moderators with him, to aid him in bringing peace to the land of Inheritance. Only three were left behind, Euphoria, Sverdar, and Hobbit.

"Hey, Hobbit, wha' wus' wrong wi' you tonight li'?" BK noted in a drunken slur, referring to the darts match that lost the three of them 16 silver coins, each! The currency was bronze, silver, and gold coins. "Well, you might have noticed it was you, as both you and Sver are drunk."
"Tha's li', so no' true..." Sverdar's slurred reply was.
"Sure it isn't"

________________________________________________________________________________

Ok, everyone who posts a reply here, will get a part, so don't be asking about getting in, ok?

Criticism, much appreciated, I suck at writing.

[MaRshMeLLoW]

Teehee. Applaud to you Mike! I particularly like the part with Yoli and Mike being married and then violently dragged away

Keep it coming!

[Carnoc]

I swear, everyone has one of these things now. If I weren't, ehm... gone, I'd probably have one, too.

Writing comments:

Mike declared himself the supreme ruler of the world, and the lord of Inheritance. And immediatly, Yoli joined him. And Massdriver shortly after, Yoli and Mike declared they were to be married.

You should probably move the punctuation around to read more like this: "Mike declared himself the supreme ruler of the world, and the lord of Inheritance. Immediatly, Yoli joined him, along with Massdriver shortly thereafter. Yoli and Mike then declared they were to be married."

and the complications that befell the land not after a month after it's release.

Take the apostrophe out of that "its." Remember that it's=it is, and it is ONLY.

But not all were too happy about the sudden loss of power, and soon, Seth dragged Matt, and Tim, away, away to a secret and hidden place, and he took many moderators with him, to aid him in bringing peace to the land of Inheritance.

Consider breaking this up into a few sentences. Also, remove some of the commas in the bolded section so it reads more like this: "and soon, Seth dragged Matt and Tim away, away to..." It flows more smoothly that way.

It ain't bad. And you know what to do with me.

*fwoosh*

[SergantMajorJefforson]

How long do you stay on, Carnoc?

[Carnoc]

If you hadn't directed that at me... Usually I snoop around the forums once every couple of days and log in *if* I see a thread that I MUST post in. I log in (invisibly), post in the thread, then immediately log out.

If that's what you're asking. It wasn't really clear.

*fwoosh*

[Sverdar]

Wait 'till you guys see the next chapter; it's going to be good.

[Hresvelgr]

This story looks like it can become quite interesting! Keep posting!

[alagaesia hobbit]

Yes, I will be getting the next one in a couple of hours, Sverdar has seen the plans to the next chapter, and he thought it was hilarious.

[alagaesia hobbit]

Second CHapter.... Sorry for double post, you were supposed to say "Ooh, post second chapter! Now!"

_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_|

By the time the trio got to their apartment complex, Sver had been sick three times, twice all over BK. Neither of the two were that capable of putting the key into the door, so Hobbit (Being the teetotaller, and also being too young to drink) had to open the door.

The three of them shared a two bedroomed apartment, Sver and BK, being better friends, shared a room, while Hobbit was in his own room. It was comfortable, and cosy, with quite a luxurious decor. It was payed for by Sver, who was left thousands of gold coins when his friend, TW North, passed away. It was either shock, or embaressment, when his trousers were ripped away from him in public by Yoli for treason, dying a truly awful death.

BK collapsed in through the door, possibly because he was leaning on it, or maybe it was because his legs were not functioning properly. It could have just been too much alcohol consumption. Either way it made Hobbit and Sverdar laugh, but Sverdar went green and turned away to throw up again. He managed to puke on the nextdoor neighbour's door, which was bad, puking on Corsair's door was not a good thing.

After finishing throwing up, Sverdar turned back and stumbled into the threshold, making a point by standing on BK's head on his way through. Shaking his head, Hobbit followed suit, and stepped over his flat-mate this time, and dragged him along with him on the way to the two friends' bedroom.

Hobbit helped Sverdar tuck BK in, who was well out, and then shut the door behind him while Sver turned in. Why do they have to get so hammered when we go for a darts game? Hobbit thought, as he crossed the kitchen/living-room/dining-room slowly, careful not to knock over any of the many half-full drinks that Knuckles and Sverdar had drunk before going to the inn and having even more.

After crossing the largest room in the apartment, Hobbit reached a door, it was a dark brown, like all others in the flat, but this one was something to him. It led to his bedroom.

Opening it, he walked into the smaller room, and sat down on the single bed in the corner, and looked around.

The room was quite equipped, wardrobe, chest of drawers, a desk, chair, and a bedside cabinet. On the bedside cabinet was a large leather bound photo album. He picked it up, undid the buckle that kept it closed, and opened it.

He smiled at what he saw, a very much alive picture, of his best friend, Euphoria. She was waving up at him and smiling back. Euphoria was very beautiful, she had dark brown, curly hair, and dark skin. Angled eyebrows and beautiful eyes. Many men went after her as a wife, and Hobbit could see why. The first page had just the one special picture, it was taken when Hobbit turned fourteen.

Turning a page, photos of other friends came into view. Many were from social occasions, like birthday parties, or weddings. Smiling at a particular picture of Risstalle. It was Darkstar's (The artist formerly known as Tyrant) twentieth birthday. And Risstalle got so drunk, that he didn't know the way home. He got scared, and started hugging a tree, crying "I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I dunno where 'e am!"

Chuckling, he turned the page again. About thirty pages were full, of the one hundred that could be filled, and Hobbit was looking forward to the day when he filled the last space.

Setting the album back down on its perch and closing it, Hobbit undressed, turned the light off, and chucked himself face-first onto his bed and fell asleep immediatly.

_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_|

Third coming soon, I'm in a writing frenzy.

[Excelsior]

This is awesomely totally hilarious. I love it.

You've still got some grammar issues, though.

"It was payed for by Sver, who was left thousands of gold coins when his friend, TW North, passed away. It was either shock, or embaressment, when his trousers were ripped away from him in public by Yoli for treason, dying a truly awful death."
This is a bit fragmental. It might be better: "He had died by either shock or embarrassment when Yoli ripped away his trousers in public for treason; it was a truly awful death."

Also
"The room was quite equipped, wardrobe, chest of drawers, a desk, chair, and a bedside cabinet."
Better:
"The room was quite well equipped, with a wardrobe, chest of..." etc.

More! Please! Soon!

[alagaesia hobbit]

Yep, I'm writing the thied chapter as I write now. Fragmentation was always my weak spot... hopefully writing will knock some good into me.

Oh, and I have you in it. A breif mention, but it might make you cry It might include marriage, but it might not, you never know =D

[Excelsior]

Cry? Why am I going to cry?

Mike...did you kill me off? *roll eyes*

[Sverdar]

Mwahah...

<_<

>_>

...heh.

Good chapter. It's funny. But I'll kill you, and sue you for plagiarism, if you end up stealing my fan base.

=)

[alagaesia hobbit]

Excel, here we go. No, this is worse than killing you off, it's MARRIAGE!

_-_-_-_-_-_-_|


Hobbit was woken by a huge splash. Which probably wasn't good, so he jumped out of his bed and dreassed hastily. Running through the door, Hobbit saw the source of commotion, and relaxed. One of BK's 'Getting un-drunk' methods was sticking his head in a barrel of freezing cold water. Shaking his head, Hobbit went to the kitchen and had a look at the calendar there, on the 21st of December, it read 'EUPHORIA'S BIRTHDAY PARTY' It was the 21st today.

"Hey, you two, it's Euphie's party today! How come we forgot?" Knuckles pulled his head out of his barrel.

"Because you're the most forgetful being alive, and Sver and I were a little drunk."

"A little?"

"Yeah, we got home, did we not? And I didn't do anything stupid,"

"No, you only lost consciousness and fell through the door, not that that means anything..."

BK's eyes widened. "I didn't!" He gasped.

"Yeeees." Was Hobbit's reply, he didn't see why BK was so surprised, he always did something stupid.

"But Sver won biggest idiot last night, he threw up on Corsair's door." Bloody chuckled at this.

"He's probably going to bury him this time, that's what 'Sair said if he did it again,"

Hobbit nodded his agreement, Corsair was what people would describe as 'neighbour from hell', he was only nice to his wife, Excelsior. To other people he shouted and ranted, damaged, and did a whole manner of other things.

Something dawned on Hobbit, and he questioned BK, "Where's Sver?" BK looked around, and thought a moment, then snapped his fingers together.

"He went to the DarkStar Arms, he must have remembered the party. We may as well go, and perhaps go and call for Prowl. He asked Euphs to marry him once."

"Lets go"

***

BK and Hobbit made a large sweep of the apartment complex, splitting up to get as many party-goers in a short time. BK collected many people, including the landlord, Hresvelgr, Sergeantmajorjefferson, Slayer Elda, and LilithVarden.

Hobbit recruited Marshmellow, who was widely known as a spy for Seth, and went by Onion and Veggie also. He even managed to get EyesOnly, and two close friends of his, ProwlingTiger, and The Chronicler. Very soon, the rowdy group was walking up the high street to DarkStar's Tavern, the most popular Inn in the land of Inheritance.

The building itself was very old looking, with a straw roof, and woodern walls. It was a known fact however, that Master of the Blade himself charmed the buildng so that no harm came to it, a departing gift between two friends.
The doors were more modern though, they swung open if you were accepted in, and were double doors, almost like a modern day nightclub.

As soon as the large host of people was accepted, they were met by a blast of laughter, talking and other party noises.

A young woman's voice squealed as they entered.

"Hobbit!"

And Hobbit found himself wrapped by two arms.

_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_|

I reckon this will never steal anyones fanbase Sam. =D

[Sverdar]

...Hmph. I am getting a little worried about the whole medieval setting. I mean, it's dangerously close to actually becoming plagiarism. Watch yourself.

=P

Good chapter, I like the last line. It makes it sound like these two disembodied arms came up and wrapped around him. I would add an adjective personally.

And I love the way you mentioned Excel. It almost made me cry for laughing.