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Posted 05 August 2008 - 10:45 PM
Chapter 1
Bucket was standing there in some weird named city in the sweltering heat.
"Dammit Demon Lord I hope this isn't a damn fluke. I turned down the invitation to go to the Chi Minh strip club." Bucket said lazily.
"Yeah, whatever." Demon Lord said taking out his Sig Sauer and and aiming at random things.
People passing by were amazed at how a giant man with a gun was taking orders from a little kid.
As Bucket and Demon Lord waited outside a Victoria's Secret shop (perverts) on a bench. They met a guy selling candy drugs to little children. He included flavors like coconut cocain, hazelnut heroin, watermelon wine, and much more. He stopped near Bucket and asked him if he wanted any. He seemed to look at both of them closely.
"You are not a candy drug dealer, you are our contact, Elven King." Bucket told him in a bored tone.
"You have a whole bunch of stuff that makes you look out. I don't feel like saying it because I am bored. So I know you wanted to know what weapons we had. Well I am unarmed, but Demon Lord here has three spiked whipping belts, a bunch of condoms, some sex toys, and a whole bunch of other stuff he could rape the hell out of you with."
Elven King paled as thoughts swirled around in his head.
"Lighten up, I was kidding. But he does have three hand grenades, two pistols, a shotgun, throwing knives, a machete, a Sig Sauer, and he really does have a spiked belt." Bucket said, laughing.
"Damn you Bucket, but oh well. I know what you are looking for. The lady is a healer, she drinks top-of-the-line alcohol and only helps in exchange for it. She is always drunk."
"Okay, so now I would ask for proof but since I don't really care, you lead the way." Bucket said, drinking some coke.
"Hey, information onl-" Elven King managed to say before Demon Lord started taking of his spiked belt.
"Okay, never mind"
"Hey before we go, can I have some tangerine tequila?" Bucket asked as he passed worrying glances at Demon Lord who was putting his belt back on. He did not want Demon to refuse.
"Oh and some blueberry blue label while you are at it." Added Demon Lord without looking up.
After a few minutes they were already to go. They started up the ferrari and ant mowed down people fast to get there. When they finally reached there Elven king jumped out and exclaimed, "wow, that was subtle."
He wondered how many people Demon Lord had killed in his life. Probably more than how much Bush did in Iraq.
When they got out and made their way to the little hut Elven King directed them into, they went in and quickly Elven King escaped. As he left, Demon Lord looked sad as he let another one away. Bucket kicked him in the shin and they started moving.
In there they saw a small deformed figure with a shawl. It was a sprite.
"Hey lady here take some wine." The lady took it and expected it. Then she took out a stick and smacked the boy with it.
"My name is Silver Drow you pubescent child."
"I thought you were a lady." Whined Bucket.
"I am bisexual you idiotic excuse for a mammal."
"Hey give me the book lady." Bucket said
"Fine, you childish little demon."
They took pictures of the pages and gave the book back to Silver Drow and they walked away.
Yada, yada, yada, details, Demon Lord details, details. Okay.
Back at the [yet to be named person] manor, Bucket was trying to crack the code. Mean while Demon Lord was reading a book called 101 ways to kill people with nothing but a spoon. He left his bratty employer with the job to crack the code of the book.
Oh just a little note, (I exaggerated a lot on the character's attitudes so they aren't portrayed equally as they are in real life IF. I basically changed them to fit the story.)
This post has been edited by Vincent: 29 August 2008 - 05:18 PM
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