[Viva America]

Okay, so you've decided to step into the footsteps of some of the popular fanfictions around here. Or, at least, you're making an attempt at it.

You just joined the forums, after lurking for a few weeks, and you have the most brilliant theories about how book IV shall go. Since the cycle moderators are bullies (They really are!) (Ok, j/k, Vincy), you are going to give it a shot at the Writer's hangout. You open a new topic, and you start to write what you think will happen at the first pages of the new book, and you basically start writing about how sorrowful Eragon is after the loss of his masters, and you will finally let Eragon and Arya tell each other about their feelings, and they will kiss and all goes well. Sort of, because your story falls into page 4 and is never receiving any views.

Angry, you leave the forums, but you'll make a short return once in a while in the hope that some people have commented on it, and almost without a fail, noone has commented.

"Wait, Jesper, what the H.E. double hockeysticks are you on about?"

Let me tell you this by a quickstart guide.

- First of all, let Wikipedia educate you about the cause of fail in your first chapter, by reading this, and this.

Let me elaborate on why Eragon and Arya can't love each other for eternity and beyond, and Murtagh can't change his true name in the very first, or the first three chapters.

Eragon had a strong connection with his masters, Oromis and Glaedr. They died, by the hand of his half-brother, Murtagh, who needs to fly back all the way to Galby, on a heavily injured dragon.

As someone who has experienced the death of a loved one, I can tell you that you won't feel any happiness the very first few month. That simply puts the possibility of a love confession to 0,000000000000000000000000000000000. Only by that fact alone, you will make a huge error when you still do it. Your story will be implausible and not read.

2nd thing, Murtagh changing his name in the first chapter. Oh yes, I've seen it done.

In the books, it is clearly stated as a long process, and you will completely change. It is not possible that, after a small torture, Murtagh will deeply hate Galby and 'feels' his true name change. He already deeply hates Galby, doesn't he? It would be more plausible for his name to change when he starts to like Galby.

Ok, that were the most popular clichés, I hope this will shed a light as to why you shouldn't do it.
(For reference; I'm at chapter 30 of my fanfic, and Eragon and Arya are actually growing away from each other again, and Murtagh's hope is sinking into the bottom, but he gets supported by the most unlikely individuals.)

The 2nd part; The march for Belatona.

Ok, I'm not telling this because I too used it in my story, but because it is true.

Imagine this: You have to lead an army of more than 10,000 troops, up to a city, through a land filled with tiny rivers. (Where one huge river is, many many small rivers are). Your army needs to be fed, so you have hundreds of oxes and carts carrying supplies and food. Also, at least a thousand of horses will be accompanying the army, either led by hand or being mounted by soldiers.

I happen to live in a country that's basically a river delta. We have the river Rhine, Meuse and Scheldt. Further more, we have large branches of those rivers, Nederrijn, Waal river and the Yssel river. My country is known for the large watermass, and the wetness of the lands. Where ever you are, the ground is ALWAYS moist.

I can picture the lands between Feinster and Belatona as almost the same. The army needs to travel along the rivers, for they need 100.000 liter of water every day for the people and the animals. Also, it's early spring by the time they leave Feinster. Everthing is soggy and muddy.

"What are you on about, Jesper?"

Well, bluntly put, you can't travel to Belatona in three days. Nor in two weeks, but it's rather likely to be at least a month, before the city gets in sight. Remember, a army moves slow, especially in swamps.

That's all for now, I was just expressing my thoughts of the moment. If I happen to come up with more stuff, I'll edit this post.

[Behave Yourself]

Amazingly long.
Amazingly well-done.
Amazingly lacking in sarcasm.

Very many 'amazings' can fit to describe this article, however, I will stop with three. I'm posting here just to tell you how damn good it is, really- there isn't much else for me to say! ^=^

James

[Kari]

Incredibly well-written, just as James said. XD At this point,, I'm questioning sarcasm's value in education, since this works so well.

A few things I could add is:

a) Thorn and Saphira becoming a pair straight-off; some pretty heavy curses have een thrown between them, and they've always been on opposing ends of the stick, so they can't just get together in a matter of hours.

b) Finding the Vault of souls in the second chapter also isn't cool. You'll have to work on the discovery either by making a long learning process, such as cross-referencing sources, or by spontaneous discovery. (Too bad they didn't have Google then.)

Just two things off the top of my head. This is a great idea, like a 'what not to do' guide for new fanfiction writers.

[Viva America]

I simply suck at sarcasm in English. Don't try to beat me at it in Dutch though

But yeah, after the 10 'How to do this' threads, a 'What not to do' thread seemed a little inevitable.

[Kari]

Teh, so true. XD And actually, good point. You speak English so well I forget you're Dutch.

[geeky Dragonrider]

This is a good Guide, But I will argue that some good twists are near impossible. (Read: leaked information about Kashmir)

[dragonking555]

I don't write fanfiction but I just wanted to add that you don't have to always make your fanfic about your own book four. Personally I think that there is so many of those and many writers on the site have not explored other possible subjects. Personally I would like to see a fanfic based on Angela's adventures prior to Eragon, Brom adventure prior o Eragon, or even the exploits of the Ra'Zac or Durza.

You could go into lots of subjects not shown much. You can explore the adventures of Murtagh and Ajhaad while they are hunting urgles in the tunnels. We only know what happens when they come back. But what were some of the adventures they had while Eragon was wounded.


There are so many other subjects that you could go into. The things above can be avoided entirely if a little branching out takes place and not every feels like the NEED to do an entire book 4.